Life, The Sucks Is Silent
by weasleylovechild
Summary: Introducing: Lily Evans as she was meant to be; a fearless, intelligent teenager thrown into the Wizarding World at a time when it had never been more dangerous. A darkly funny drama about friendship, love, petrified owls, and above all - James Potter.


"Ours is the cause of all mankind: get loved, make more, try to stay alive." 

**Life: The Sucks Is Silent (or, _The Teenage Guide To Reaching Afterlife Without Peeves Writing a Song For You & Other Frightening Things_)**

Summary - Introducing: Lily Evans as she was meant to be. A fearless, intelligent teenager thrown into the Wizarding World at a time when it has never been more dangerous. A darkly funny noir drama about betrayal, unlikely friendships, petrified owls, and above all - James Potter. (Completely canon, with a unique twist.)

A/N - After centuries of reading outstanding fanfics, I have managed to find enough creativity to write my own version of the Lily Evans story. Any reviews would be appreciated (good or bad), as they are probably what will compel me to write more. I have the basic outline of the story in my head and I cannot wait to put it all into words. If anyone has seen Veronica Mars or read any Meg Cabot books, you will see how much those two things influenced this fic. I love Lily, and I really think her character should be more like a Veronica/Mia rather than a Hermione Granger.**  
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**Chapter 1: Hate Is Such A Weak Word**

I was reasonably certain I had never truly hated anyone before. Resented, yes. But it was nearly impossible for me to have purely negative emotions toward a person. Of course, the opposite is far from true.

The PEOPLE WHO WISH I WAS HIT BY A TRAIN LIST (It's growing every day.):

1)**MY SISTER** – Petunia despises me well beyond those normal borders of sibling rivalry. I would be upset about the fact that Petunia hasn't uttered a single civil thing to me in the past five years (Unless you count the routine "Welcome Home…freak" she squeezes out when forced to pick me up at King's Cross each summer. But I don't.) if I didn't have a sea of other haters to worry about.

2) **SEVERUS SNAPE** – Back when I was eleven and blissfully ignorant, if I had to predict who my best friends would be five years down the road, there would be no doubt that I would have said "Petunia and Severus". Weirdly enough, those two top the list. While I can pinpoint the exact time and place when Petunia began hating me, I have absolutely no idea about Severus. He simply stopped meeting my eye in the hallway, with murmurs of "Hello" – the closest to public intimacy Severus can ever get. The notes I sent to him were returned back in shreds. Some remnants were big enough to see the numerous question marks I had scribbled all over them. I still doubt that Severus would just cut me out of his life on his own accord. Most likely, it has something to do with the next people on the list.

3)**SLYTHERINS, THE HAUGHTY PURE-BLOOD TYPE** (wait, isn't that the only type?) – From the Queen Snake, Narcissa Black, down to the second-years who growl when I pass the third-floor corridor, the Slytherins despise me and everybody like me. Why? I'm a Muggle-Born and smarter than them (who isn't?). Enough said.

4) This is the big one, folks. **JAMES POTTER**. Think Lucifer, the teen years. With an even larger god complex. Anyone who comes in the way of the expansion of his ego bubble, will be the target of a psychotic, insatiable grudge. I think mine was held since our first year. At least in the past, my role as his enemy was shared with tons of others. It seems this year, his hatred for me has multiplied. Now I'm the main focus in his "who to make life a living hell for" project. The general public is relieved that they no longer have to worry about growing a tail in the hallway or finding their lunch transfigured into a dungbomb – and do everything they can to make sure the grudge holds. Having to endure Potter's malicious remarks is not as bad as having the entire school mimic his ways. Of course, the biggest jackass also has to be the most popular guy in school. So, we can add Potter's entire fan-base to the list (read: three-quarters of Hogwarts' female population, including Black and Pettigrew).

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Which brings us to the present time where I was thinking of making my own "Who I wish was standing in front of the Hogwarts Express" list. My jaw was tightly clenched and my hand was literally twitching towards Potter's throat – this doesn't constitute as hate, right?

"You added the wrong powder AGAIN!!" exclaimed the bespectacled Ravenclaw next to me, who I was lucky enough to be paired with for today's Potions experiment. The main contact I had with the guy before was through his energetic inquiries about my test scores. His social skills are somewhat underdeveloped, since he spends most of his time in the library. If I didn't know any better, I would have guessed he and Mrs. Pince had some weird love affair going on. But he seemed a bit afraid of the female species in general, so I threw that theory out the window.

"Okay, okay, relax." I said, swishing my wand to perform a nullifying spell.

"You can't just do that every time you mess up. The potion will lose its remedying powers." I rolled my eyes. As if we weren't just going to dump it out after class. I would be genuinely afraid if people used the potions that our class made, what with people like Peter Pettigrew here. "What's with you anyway?" He said, "You look murderous."

"Better get the knife out of my reach, then." I said. The Ravenclaw didn't smile.

I glared once more at Potter two tables ahead, laughing loudly with Lydia Addison, of all people. What did she have to say that was so hilarious? Her stupidity? Or her straggly, "perfectly manicured" fingers that were now snaking up Potter's forearm. "Wow, James, Quidditch is really doing wonders for your biceps." She giggled. My stomach flipped as I watched James smile at _her_, pecking her forehead with a kiss.

"Ugh, I just tasted a little bile thinking about their progeny," I said, beckoning towards the table. "A family with a combined Wizarding IQ of 75."

The Ravenclaw grinned slightly, for what seemed like the first time. "Quite annoying they are. Can't they see some people actually do work during class?"

I looked around. It seemed that we were the only ones still bothering with our potion. Slughorn had disappeared. Likely, off to get some breakfast leftovers from the house elves. I should really never have told him about that secret entrance. Sirius Black was juggling metal asphodel for a bunch of female spectators on the other side of the room. And doing surprising well. Remus Lupin had started a chocolate frog race in the back. As usual, the Marauders were the kings of the classroom.

I decided to simply ignore the periodical squeals of laughter and the sighs of "Oh, James" from in front of us, and engage my lab partner in an actual conversation. "So what about you? Are you always this much of a drag?" I asked, propping myself on the table.

"Yes. As a baby, all the other toddlers at Pigtails Daycare used to complain about Bartleby. The kid who played in the corner with the cauldron rather than with those lame toy broomsticks. They only lift you up two feet, for all the hype surrounding them! As if I would abandon my erumpent fluid for that." He said, looking down at the unfinished potion. "Can you come down from the table, please? It's making me nervous."

"I need to block my eyes from that horrendous scene in front of us." I said. "So, is your name really Bartleby?"

"I'm guessing it was some unfunny joke that my father thought of. He has a lot of those."

I nodded, "I'm Lily Evans, by the way." He snorted, "I've been living in the library. Not under a rock. Although, people do call you Lil Slutt—" I interjected, "Alright, no need for the gruesome details."

"All right. We can stop working if you answer a question for me." Bartleby said, finally looking up from the potion, adjusting his glasses on his nose.

"Fine. Not about my grades, please."

"No need. You dropped out of the top five in our year a while ago. No longer a threat to me. What I want to know is – what _happened_to you?" Bartleby looked at me, inquisitively.

At that moment, James turned around and met my eyes for a split second. I looked away immediately before I started to question why they looked so distressed. The bell rang.

Another A/N: Short chapter, I know. I want to see if people actually like it before I write some more. So please, **give me some comments**! I'm enabling the anonymous review, if anonymity is what rocks your boat. Or you are just too lazy to log in.

_What's coming? _Plenty of flashbacks if you are feeling confused as to how Lily's reputation became tarnished. Plus, James and Lily exchange some super-snarky comments.


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